@lovemydogduck: I have an eating disorder. I'm about to eat dis order of pizza, dis order of fries and dis order of nuggets.
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@OldSpookMan: I overheard my daughter asking the little boy next door, "Are you the opposite sex, or am I."
@BrianHDot: Chinese Food: $16.72 Gas to Get to Restaurant: $1.94 Getting Home and Realizing They Forgot One of Your Food Containers: Riceless
@JasonLastname: Go into a bathroom stall and write: "For A Good Time Call Your Mother. She Misses You & Enjoys Hearing Your Voice."