@drunkNnaughty: I have CDO. It's like OCD, but the letters are in alphabetical order. Like they should be.
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@LaceyNycole: 2-year-old: *points to my belly* Baby! Me: Yep, there's a baby in there! Will you love it? 2: I eat it. Well that escalated quickly.
@FatherWithTwins: By the time my 5yo is done with his dinner, it'll be time to start applying to colleges.
@Kyle_Lippert: You're a dog person? *Throws a stick* Well? Aren't you going to run after it or are you cool with being a normal human that's also a liar?
@AtticusFinch79: <gets on elevator > Pushes all the buttons Hugs everyone Prays out loud that we're not going to die Gets off at the 2nd floor Laughs