@thatUPSdude: I heard someone say their podcast was on "hiatus", guess that sounds better than "my mom took away my laptop".
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@BestWorstAdvice: If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't comeback, tell everyone she has herpes.
@TheAlexNevil: My first job in retail taught me that the customer is always right. Until they're out of earshot.
@WeissBrandon: Cop: FREEZE, DON'T MOVE!!! Me: *stops moving* Cop: GET DOWN ON THE GROUND Me:... Cop: NOW! Me:... Me:... Cop: for the love of god...unfreeze