@DirtMcTurd: I just did my own taxes for the first time and I'm glad I did because I'm getting 8 million dollars back this year!
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Reverend_Scott: Fun Fact: Valentine's Day was created by a woman than didn't get what she wanted for Christmas.
@BangMyBongo: Hell is where Sarah Palin is president, Taylor Swift is in love with me, and Kim Kardashian names all the children
@yerpalmildsauce: *noise* GF: there's somebody in the kitchen! ME: *already unsheathing my blade* that's where the food is
@TheToddWilliams: [movie casting] ME: I'm here for the stuntman job "Do you have any experience?" ME: No, but I took a… "Please don't" ME: …crash course