@theshamingofjay: I just googled Magnum condoms and I swear I could hear Siri laughing.
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@batkaren: ROBOT: You cannot defeat us ENGLISH TEACHER: Why's the ch pronounced differently in orchid than in orchard? ROBOT: [twitch, spark]
@allisulli: LOL"Twitter is better with friends. We found some people you might know". Block Block Block Block
@ch000ch: it's always sad when you have to take your sick goldfish out to the pasture and shoot it in the head.
@MatCro: ME: Michaelangelo painted the Sistine Chapel on his back? GF: Yep M: [2 hours later] How did he reach the bit between his shoulders?