@DanMentos: I just had the biggest bowel movement of my life then turned around and the toilet was empty. Needless to say I completely lost my shit
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@LoveNLunchmeat: 50 years ago, nerds were smart. Now a nerd is just someone who likes Star Wars and eats a lot of cereal.
@Sickayduh: Even the most racially sensitive person you know gets a little skeptical when the chef at a Chinese restaurant isn't Asian
@purch_s: Buy an aquarium. Don't buy fish. Tell guests there are fish. Enjoy time spent not having to talk to guests while they look for fish.