@AGreaterMonster: I just ran for the train so I think I'm good on running for a couple years.
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@KalvinMacleod: HER: my dad hates puns but loves food ME: got it HER: dad, this my date ME: hey papaya yam glad to meat u HIM: *shakes then crushes my hand*
@Steven37366100: Stealthily I approach the deer, removing an arrow from my quiver Deer: I can see you AND you’re literally saying that out loud
@jctwritesstuff: Cop: Know why I pulled you over? Me: Was it the air guitar? Cop: *shy* Yeah can... can I get your autograph? Me: Happens all the time. Cop: Thanks! Me: Hey! This is a ticket!