@KentWGraham: I just used one of those plastic grocery dividers to let my wife know exactly where the middle of the bed is.
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@JCWisdomNuggets: Server: Want one of our famous milkshakes? Me: Well, I saw your yard and it was empty. Server: Huh? Me: No boys. Server: Huh? Me: No thanks.
@UncleDuke1969: [typing] Me: Is it DISCREET or DISCRETE? Wife: 2nd. Me: Is "polyamorous" hyphenated? Wife: No. Why? Me: It's for work. When's your flight?