@shutupmikeginn: I just walked in on two coworkers crying in a conference room and I was like, "mind if I join?"
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@KeetPotato: drummer: "just add er on the end of your instrument" guy who plays trumpet: "so im a trumpeter, ok cool" guy who plays trombone: "oh no"
@WilliamAder: My wife's been working in our garden for two solid days now. I never realized tomatoes required a big, six-foot-deep hole like that.