@bridger_w: I know blood in horror movies is just corn syrup, but it's still terrifying because at this point, that's basically all my blood is
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@crunchenhanced: Florida mom delivers 14-pound baby after surprise pregnancy . Florida?? NO PART of this story surprises me.
@GoldenSpirals: Me: Goodnight Moon. Moon: Don't "Goodnight" me! Do you know what time it is? Where the hell have you been?
@CastAwayKristen: Me: Dropped my phone & now screen doesn’t work. Help forum: Should’ve had a better case. Apparently, my mother works in Samsung support now.