@sbellelauren: i know how hard it must have been for my parents to tell me there was no santa because i just had to tell my parents there's no jesus
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@1Happytwit: Some bloke on FB called me a clown. Now I've got to go hide under his bed with a knife cause that's what clowns do.
@TheToddWilliams: [grandma's house] Little Red Riding Hood: Are you going to eat me? Wolf: I just want my hoodie back.
@TheMichaelRock: *texting with my mom* Mom: I miss your handsome face! Me: Aww..thanks, mom! I miss you too! Mom: Sorry. Wrong number.