@CaseyMichelle__: I know I'm in trouble when the voice in my head starts using my middle name
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@Fred_Delicious: [penguin waddles into computer repair store] "Hi yes my laptop is frozen" ... Computer repair guy - "how did you get to Milwaukee"
@pbear79: I asked a waiter how they prepare their chicken. He said... "Meh, nothing special. We just straight out tell them they're going to die."