@JElvisWeinstein: I know my computer doesn't have a virus because I've never had an 8-bit skull and crossbones pop up onscreen laughing.
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@kcmoore51: *puts arm around you* You've been burned before but, you're safe with me. Let your gaurd down, girl. *steals your pizza*
@cjwerleman: Boy, ISIS are going to be pissed when they find out New Atheists talk about God more than them.
@AdderallMomma: Folks are worried about global warming and social security, when the real crisis is that one day elderly drivers will know how to text.