@Cheeseboy22: I know you're not supposed to hug the old lady giving out samples at Costco, but the sausage she gave me had cheese inside. Cheese.In.Side.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@causticbob: My wife said "You only love me because my father left me a million pounds." "That's not true, I'd still love you whoever left it to you"
@Home_Halfway: I once went to a party with 10% battery life on my phone so you can shut the hell up about your "scary" battle at Normandy, grandpa.
@Schmoodles: I can never remember if it's "laying" or "lying." Anyway, I hit a dude with my car and he's doing one of them in the middle of the road. :(