@Cheeseboy22: I know you're not supposed to hug the old lady giving out samples at Costco, but the sausage she gave me had cheese inside. Cheese.In.Side.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@River_Niles: Today I found out my nephew is scared of the vacuum.. Today I also found out I have a very dark cruel evil side to me..
@FaisalAdam_: This, being a gentleman thing really works. Women just fall for me when I offer them my handkerchief. Sure it's dabbed in chloroform...
@SamuelHLowe: If you're ever on death row, request Denny's for your last meal so you can live an extra year waiting on your order.
@mynameisntdave: [diner] ME: I'll have the eggs, please WAITER: how would you like those? ME: painted and hidden for me to find, thank you.