@offbeatoliv: I like how Angelina waited to divorce Brad Pitt until Jen got married. Well played Maleficent...well played...
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@DonSchanke: For once I would like to find a babysitter that doesn't get all upset when she gets to my house and realizes I don't have kids
@iwearaonesie: [laying in bed] wife: Did you remember to find a stud before you hung the TV up? me: Yes *sound of TV crashing to the floor* me: No
@kumailn: My favorite romantic comedy sub-genre is "Hugh Grant falls in love with someone for no reason."
@turtledumplin: We all have that one friend who thinks they can sing...and if you can't think of who, that friend is you.