@offbeatoliv: I like how Angelina waited to divorce Brad Pitt until Jen got married. Well played Maleficent...well played...
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@Eightinchgoat: I have high blood pressure, but my dogs don't. So, from now on I'm only getting upset about squirrels and mailmen.
@weinerdog4life: Blind Date Tip: In the middle of dinner throw a surprise punch to see if they are really blind
@dumbbeezie: Sometimes my sarcasm doesn’t deliver well and people miss the message. Anyway that’s why I’m stabbing you.
@RidiculousSheri: I'd like to say I have a yoga body, but it's really more of a Yoda body. Resist all the cheese, I can't.