@MakeYourBedlam: I like reserving tables at restaurants using unique names so I can hear the hostess announce, "Optimus Prime? Your table for 5 is ready!"
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@brennadine: Hang on guys. My boyfriend told me not to be anxious, so I expect to feel better any moment.
@yerpalmildsauce: I may not be the coolest guy in town but I am the coolest guy in my apar-- *cockroach wearing tiny leather jacket scuttles by*
@LostCatDog: Old professor stands in front of class: Look to your left. Now look to your right. Now look directly behind you. Welcome to Owl School