@sweetg35: I like to test the waters by pushing people in.????
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@KeetPotato: [babies txting] "my dad's thumb just came off" lol wtf 😂 "wait its back on again nvm" ok lmao "he just stole my nose" im phoning the police
@Bratch_Patch: "Friends are a dime a dozen." *pulls out a sack full of dimes* "Sweet, I'll take 32 dozen friends please."
@lloydrang: Parents who say they love their children unconditionally have obviously never had a kid choose tuba as their band instrument.
@DaddyJew: No, YOUUU had a kid just so you could have someone to eat pizza and play video games with