@StellaRtwot: I like to yawn in front of people so they yawn and then I can say "You're tired I should go."
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@garrydavenport: "We've been doing this for years, I simply can't be bothered thinking up another long scientific name. Drink?" - people who named the fly.
@DosieDoe: US Loretta Lynch confirms that all 7 FIFA officials dramatically threw themselves onto the ground faking injury when arrested earlier today.
@AntDiPalma: A religious family member literally said "Spongebob goes too far sometimes" and I can not stop laughing.