@JimmerThatisAll: I live in a high crime neighbourhood if you count socks with sandals.
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@JohnLyonTweets: [first day as a Twitter designer] Never mind an edit button. What people really want are round avis.
@truegritrumble: ME: *trying to fit in* I ALSO don't fly. PENGUINS: *shuffling about while trying to keep their distance* ZOOKEEPER: Sir, get out of the pen.
@GreenEyedJedi: I once dated a guy who left a trail of rose petals leading to a sinkful of dirty dishes.