@WonderMonkey78: I love it when all my iPhone apps tremble in fear when I'm about to delete one of them. Makes me feel like God.
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@Contwixt: I thought I Kuwait but then I Saudi Turkey and my Bahrain was like Oman I Israel Hungary so Iran.
@daemonic3: THERAPIST: My suggestion for you: Therapy dog ME: Ok [next week] THERAPIST: Well? ME: They told me I don't qualify to be a therapy dog
@poutinesmoothie: *bends over to pick a four leaf clover but gets struck by a falling ACME safe before doing so*
@LnL245: I secretly gave our Waffle House waitress a $100 tip and my family can't figure out why she's crying & hugging me & trying to get in our car