@caliraingirl: I love the smell of fabric softener through the outside vents when people do the laundry. I get a lot of restraining orders though.
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@JulieSnark: Pepsi and Coke can't even be in the same restaurant together and society wants us all to get along. Pffftt.
@XplodingUnicorn: I can fake my way through most conversations with my kids if I just look up from my phone every time they stop talking and say "no."
@HpHubert: Apparently, you can only say "Look at you! You got so big!" to kids. Old girlfriends tend to get offended. Who knew?