@PinkCamoTO: I miss the 80s, when you could hide an alien in your room for 3 days before mom found out and five kids on bikes could outsmart the police.
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@NicestHippo: Props to every deodorant commercial ever for abandoning all creativity and just going with "If you buy this, women will have sex with you"
@XplodingUnicorn: Me: Clean up your toys off the floor. 4-year-old: You have to clean, too. Me: They're your toys. 4: It's your floor.
@kyry5: I never got why people liked sitting home without pants so much until I was without a job for a week. Now I don't get why people have jobs.
@LurkAtHomeMom: Me: Pick that up! 7: Can't you? Me: You're lower to the ground 7: But you're used to doing things that aren't fun How's your summer going?