@SpencerLenox: I offered Kinkos $5 for this... they said no.
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@electrolemon: i'm so sorry sir, but we here at chase bank don't accept gun-for-money exchanges. and we need an amount, not just "all the money you got"
@Rollinintheseat: When you're talking to someone with no teeth, you find out teeth are also a retaining wall for spit.
@Shot_Of_Cabo: [ phone call ] Wife: You want the white 7" or the black 9". Me: The black 9". ..and if she wasn't tablet shopping this would be awkward.
@SuitableHolmes: Words can not even begin to describe your beauty and how much I need to borrow your car.