@truegritrumble: I once dated a girl so my pet rock wouldn't be embarrassed after he threw himself at her window.
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@myonlymizztake: Note to self: Used VHS tapes do not make good emergency gifts, always go with stuff from the freezer.
@LizHackett: If you marry someone a few years older, one thing they love is when any classic rock song comes on and you ask "Is this Led Zeppelin?"
@brennadine: Therapist: So what happened in your last relationship? I lost him to addiction. Therapist: I'm so sorry. Drugs? Yes please.