@truegritrumble: I once dated a girl so my pet rock wouldn't be embarrassed after he threw himself at her window.
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@OBiiieeee: If you watch the Mighty Ducks backwards it's about a hockey team that starts sucking so bad that the coach leaves and becomes an alcoholic.
@KKAlThani: "Good evening, I will be your waiter for tonight. What would you like to Instagram?" - how waiters should greet people