@truegritrumble: I once dated a girl so my pet rock wouldn't be embarrassed after he threw himself at her window.
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@KyleMcDowell86: [on date] *okay don't let her know you're a T-Rex* Her: Can you pass the salt please? Me: Crap...
@DVSblast: I HAVE DECIDED TO MAKE A CONSCIOUS DECISION NOT TO HAVE MY MIND "BLOWN" ANYMORE. IF DINOSAURS COME BACK & I SEE ONE I'LL JUST BE LIKE "GOOD"
@AIMMadellynne: Just saw the little boy next door licking whip cream off the cat. Pretty sure he heard something he shouldn't have.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: If Thor is a woman, what's next? Woman doctors? Woman lawyers? Woman mothers? When will it end?