@Dawn_M_: I only use shampoo that smells like raspberries so people don't think it's weird when I have jam in my hair.
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@sageboggs: The Commandments 1) def don't kill 2) no stealing, obvs 3) don't say my name? idk 4) luv ur neighbs! 5) but don't LOVE-love them, that's bad
@ashmensch: If you want my body and you think I'm sexy, please stop buying your prescription glasses at Walmart.
@noog: *opens facebook messenger* *sips mtn dew twice* *strokes neckbeard* *begins typing* Sorry abt ur mom dying Tis a shame Btw ur attractive
@WilliamRodgers: 18 is TOO young to get married! You can't even buy booze at 18! If you can't buy booze, how the hell are you gonna make a marriage work?!?