@RuinMyWeek: I photoshopped myself into a photo booth strip a coworker had on her desk and replaced it. And now we wait...
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@TheAlexNevil: *horror movie "The calls are coming from inside the house!" "Can you find out from where? I want some chips but I'm too lazy to get up."
@murrman5: [trying to avoid awkward silence on first date] you ever see a horse throw up? "no" *smiles and turns phone sideways so video gets bigger*
@EliTerry: Imagine a bunch of Italian mobsters tiptoeing and trying not to giggle as they gingerly place a horse head in bed with a sleeping guy.