@RuinMyWeek: I photoshopped myself into a photo booth strip a coworker had on her desk and replaced it. And now we wait...
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@daemonic3: [1st date] "My birthday is on April 20th, so 4/20. Isn't that cool? When's yours?" Oh, umm *sweating* Sextember 69th
@WheelTod: The odds of being killed by a shark are 1 in 3,748,067. So if you know 3,748,066 people who haven't been killed by a shark: avoid the ocean.
@rolldiggity: "Hey, man, just called to see when you're going to commercial. Now? Ok, us too." -Radio Stations