@Phlegmingway: I prefer science to religion, as the former doesn't seem to grow vengeful and jealous when refused attention.
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@angelunatic_: Picture me and my boyfriend on a dinner date Wrong We're sitting on the same side of the table making you uncomfortable
@flashember: ME: this is Inky my pet octopus, Stompy my elephant and Mr Butters my horse FRIEND: the horse isn't Hoofy or something? ME: grow up Kalvin
@givesnoerection: I moved out of my parents house so I could have sex whenever I wanted, I had no idea it would always be with myself.
@Mr_Kapowski: If you wear a cape to a meal, you can spin it around to the front and have a full sized bib for eating