@sarcasticmommy4: I put my symptoms into WebMD & it turns out I just have kids.
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@Phook75: Opening a bag of M&M's will produce no sound to a normal human. A toddler, it's like the atomic blast at Nagasaki to those creatures
@juliussharpe: Management tip - only hire bald guys. They don't have anything going on besides work.
@backporchlady: Asking me if I want a bag for the box of tampons I just bought is like asking me if they're for here or to go.