@MrsGoose69: I put the U in murder
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@a_olivia4212: We have a saying in Germany. It is better to have loved and lost than to engage in a land war with Russia in the winter.
@POTerritory: Him: You put feathers of a crow in this drink? Me: Yes, I made sure they all came from 1 crow. It's... Him: Please don't. Me: ...single molt
@LoveNLunchmeat: Guinea pigs aren't real pets. You buy them when your kids are begging for a dog, but you want to make them sad instead.