@AndDesist: I regularly have gold plaques and 1st place ribbons made up for my liver so it knows just how much I appreciate all it's hard work.
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@DillDoes: [Bar] "What'll you have" Scotch "You want it neat" No thanks *bartender throws some crumbs and hair in my whisky* Thanks
@whosnutstoo: Your heart beats faster, your knees go weak, you start to sweat. Is this love? No you're probably hypoglycemic
@kevnasto: I just called up the phone company and put em on hold. Every 5min i come on an tell them how important their business is to me. Please hold.
@Eves1: Ok guys, I have 28 minutes to kill before I casually need to respond to a text message. What's up?