@OneFunnyMummy: I remember Daddy told me fairy tales can come true so any time an old lady offers me an apple or cookie I kill her and bury her in the woods
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@JimmerThatisAll: Little does this young woman in the house behind mine who just closed the curtains know that it was the curtains I was looking at.
@ZiddiAkki: Me washing my car Neighbour: Hey what’s up? Washing your car? Me: No, I’m watering it to see if it’ll grow into a bus.