@OldUncleDaveO: I run from my car all the way to the front door of McDonald's because fitness is a lifestyle
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@ehdannyboy: *phone rings* Wife - "Quick! Pretend I'm not in!" Me - *strips naked and does running man* Wife - "...."
@tech_pirate: 1 in 5 people are Chinese. Only 5 people in my family, it's either mom or dad, brother Colin, younger brother Ho Chan. I think it's Colin.
@crouton_futon: "Oh shit I murdered someone" "You should turn yourself into the police" "Great idea!" *puts on badge and hat* "Looks like a suicide to me"