@KentWGraham: I saved a ton of money on cool sports cars, vacation getaways and NFL season tickets by having children.
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@DadandBuried: Women never understand the importance of cords. We NEED to keep all these cords, just in case! What if we run out of cords!
@nigelgodwin: How do you know when you are too drunk to drive? When you swerve to miss a tree and then realise it was your air freshener..
@TheIronSherk: Why is it called a "network of computers streaming Disney movies to cows" and not "Moo-LAN"