@TylerLinkin: I saw an image of Jesus in my breakfast burrito. I asked myself, what would Jesus do? And so I ate him. Two hours later... Holy Shit!
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Jeffwni: Son: DAD! There's a mobster under my bed! Me: Aaw, cute. You mean monster? Son: No [from under the bed] "Whatcha gonna do 'bout it big guy?"
@Dani_Feld: What they say: Want a bite of my sandwich? What I hear: How much of this sandwich can you fit in your mouth?
@UncleDuke1969: "Dad, I don't feel good." "Do you want to go see the doctor?" "Yeah." "Are you gonna throw up?" "Maybe." "OK. We'll take your mom's car."