@Sickayduh: I sexually identify with the black guy in a horror movie because this won't last long and we all know it
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@AristotlesNZ: Me: My friend really likes you. Her: I'm a lesbian. Me: Ah ok... Her: ... Me: ... Her: ... Me: So... What part of Lesbia are you from?
@Home_Halfway: FLEETWOOD MAC: Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies ME: Ok. Bears always catch salmon cause they think they're saving them from drowning
@astutenewf: When I'm bored, I like to superglue Doritos to my cat and make it run around the house like a stegosaurus.