@ericsshadow: I shake my bottled water so the H's & O's are evenly distributed.
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@ventivodkacran: When someone yells "STOP!" I never know if it's Hammertime or if I should collaborate and listen.
@Mr_Kapowski: Me: Can I bring my wife? Travel Agent: Of course Me: But I'm hetero. Does that matter? Travel Agent: Do you think I'm saying Gayman Islands?
@DrDogMD: CAT: Can u check my blood pressure? DR DOG: *places cuff around cat's neck* Sure CAT: Shouldnt that go on m- DR DOG: *inflating cuff* Ssshhh
@MannyDiesel: Will smith literally runs in every movie. Name one movie he didn't run in. I'll wait