@osoplain: I should start carrying a pool noodle in my car and randomly smack cars when stuck in traffic
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@david8hughes: [skydiving with my dog] Me: ur ears r inside out My dog: can't hear u my ears r inside out Me: it's the wind My dog: I think it's the wind
@PunkHistory: "You gotta keep 'em separated!" -the dude from the Offspring whenever he's doing laundry.
@ItsJennaMarbles: Running away doesnt help you with your problems, unless you're fat. Then yeah, run.
@StarWarsProblms: Kylo Ren: Hey, why is my paycheck so low? General Hux: Damages. Maybe you should stop throwing temper tantrums with your lightsaber.