@OnlyFastEddie: I stick pins and needles in the people I don't like because can't afford voodoo dolls.
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@SatansTongue: "You can be anything!" Okay I'm going to be Kanye west "Josh that's not what I meant" Shhhh *puts my finger to her lips* It's Kanye now
@TheMichaelRock: *wife gives me a big hug before I leave for work* I love you too, babe! [later] Where's my credit card? Son of a..
@Fruit_Slinger: I'm hungry but broke so I'm waiting for my bf to say he's hungry too than he'll order something delicious while I pretend to be indifferent.