@OnlyFastEddie: I stick pins and needles in the people I don't like because can't afford voodoo dolls.
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@Parker_Simpson: Thinking ab including nude photos of me in my Tinder profile to weed out women who vomit easily
@CandyCrisis: Captain Hook hated Paper Scissors Rock since he could only play Question Mark, which had no value in the game.
@daemonic3: [spelling bee] Judge: Your word is McConaughey McConaughey. M-C-C-O-N-A-U-G-H-E-Y, McConaughey. Did I get it? Judge: We have no idea
@krisv_723: The only thing between me & a killing spree is the fact that I'd have to poop in front of people in prison.