@lmwortho: I think if a trained monkey could drive a car, cook & give out money, my kids wouldn't notice it wasn't me. I need a monkey.
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@weinerdog4life: How do I stay in shape? I stole an ostrich, it chases me around the house all day, i hate it
@KevinBuffalo: The best place to get pumpkins cheap is driving around the neighborhood at 4AM. Got 5 nice ones this morning.