@CodyJP9412: I think one of the toughest parts about growing up is realizing that you don't sweat blue if you drink blue Gatorade.
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@dumbbeezie: Holiday tip. Always buy people gifts that you would like for yourself in case they piss you off before Christmas
@kentgrossarth: Me: Nice flowers. Co-worker: They're from my boyfriend. Now I'm going to spend all weekend w/my legs in the air. Me: Don't you have a vase?
@thatdutchperson: [making flamingos] God: bird. Adam: got it. G: but it stand still a lot. A: ok.. G: on one leg. A: how high are you? G: make it pink.
@TheTennisPhenom: hello 911, yeah me again. so listen 29 of my recent tweets have been stolen and.. hello? hello?