@wilw: I think the blue states should get the taco trucks first, and the red states have to wait, because elections have consequences.
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@dougbies: I like long, romantic walks away from women that try catching the bouquet at weddings
@rockymomax: wife: [walks in door] so whats the big news? -the baby walked! wife: OMG where is he? -i sent him to the store for an ice cream cake
@trojansauce: ME: hey baby HOT GIRL: ME: HOT GIRL: ME: HOT GIRL: ME: *looks closer* HOT GRILL: ME: oh