@Sal0630: I thought a drone was the sound women make when you're trying to watch the game?
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@SlappNuttz: My wife just gave me an ultimatum, it’s either her or Twitter. So, sadly this will be my last tweet, where I mention having a wife.
@HeyZeus666: I'm no different than any other bachelor. I put my pants on one leg at a time and clean the house once every new girlfriend.
@DurtMcHurtt: When I die, I hope I have enough time to point at a complete stranger and whisper "you did this."
@JohnHilsen: Galadriel told Frodo only he could destroy the ring. Smokey Bear said only YOU can prevent wildfires. Frodo did his job; did you do yours?