@BooFricketyHoo: I thought I had life all sorted out, and then the wind blew.
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@leshnevsky: - Dad, why don't we visit Greece to see pyramids? - Son, why don't we visit school to see your geography teacher?
@Home_Halfway: "Let's do 5 sets of squats & then try lifting for an hour. It looks like you got out of shape after your dad died" ~ Really personal trainer
@NJFreudian: Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the town Not a creature was Tweeting, cause favstar was down.
@rickkondell: The plural of beer is beer, which is very convenient when you are explaining to your wife why you were late coming home from work.