@BooFricketyHoo: I thought I had life all sorted out, and then the wind blew.
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@girlwithatail: This woman's "I'm deleting my Facebook" post has 52 comments and she's replied to all of them. Not a strong start.
@MisterBombay: If I were a fashion designer I wouldn't spend any money on advertising but rather pay old people to wear my competitor's clothing
@GingerHotDish: I sent my boyfriend a picture of my taco. Yeah, he was disappointed that wasn't a euphemism as well.
@ValeeGrrl: Husband: *hacks up lung* I think I'm comin down with something Me: lol ok whatever Kid: *tiny cough* Me: OMG MY POOR BABY COME TO MOMMA