@Sickayduh: I thought I saw Bradley Cooper but it was just every poem ever written formed into a beach sunset with amazing hair
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@_SetTheHook_: Worst thing about having sex with a Canadian girl is having to sit through BOTH of our national anthems before we start.
@daemonic3: JESUS: I shall turn water to wine JUDAS: Actually wine is 85% water so that's only 15% miracle JESUS: This is literally the WORST betrayal
@BadJordon: Wearing my bathing suit as underwear in case a random pool party breaks out sounds way better than too lazy to do laundry.