@TheWoodenslurpy: I thought I saw Jesus in a cookie. But I was wrong. It was just a guy who looked like him.
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@jonnysun: "knock knock" whos there "orange" orange who "orange u glad im not a banana?" .... MARTHA THERES A RACIST ORAMGE AT THE DOOR DO I LET HIM IN
@rickkondell: If you need to rush somewhere, carry a fire extinguisher. Nobody will stop a person running with a fire extinguisher.
@hippieswordfish: *sees red lobster commercial* oh shit that looks good *goes to red lobster* what the absolute hell happened in here