@KevinBuffalo: I told my daughter we might be getting a blizzard and she asked for one with Reese's pieces
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@anjadrisch: I can't remember where I parked my car an hour ago but I can recall how stupid I was at 20. Please God erase that memory & bring back my car
@sammyrhodes: There is no peer pressure like washing your hands because someone else walked into the bathroom.
@Surgyen: Algebra,trignometry, and calculus are responsible for more doctors than the actual love for the profession.
@That_Damn_Duck: I bet the women who only tweet about sex are probably some of the nicest men you’ll ever meet in person.