@rodney_at_large: I tried oscillating once. Not a fan.
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@2sassymom: Twitter is awesome. You can have a boyfriend right in your phone. Available at all times. Unless his wife's around.
@robfee: Dads in horror movies always have the most chill explanations. "Our son is covered in pentagrams!" Well maybe he's just allergic to dairy.
@KalvinMacleod: POLICE SKETCH ARTIST: is this the man who robbed u *holds up picture of himself* ME: yes POLICE SKETCH ARTIST: give me ur wallet ME: dang it
@TheRealRHB: Debit card was repeatedly declined at the grocery store today. I was trying to buy vegetables so the bank just assumed the card was stolen