@Sickayduh: I tried to kill a spider by drowning it in douche and now it keeps picking fights with me on social media
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@HogwartsLogics: Harry wasn't chosen for Ravenclaw because he tried to catch the Hogwarts letters from the air instead of taking one from the floor.
@GABBYdaAngSaya: [Last Supper] Jesus: *holds up bread* This is my body *holds up wine* This is my blood And this is Sparta! *kicks Judas into a pit*