@Mr_Kapowski: I want to know the backstory of when an eyelash turns evil and says "That's it. I'm done protecting the eye. I'm going in to destroy it now"
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@TheCatWhisprer: [cats at shelter] Where's Frank? "Got adopted 3 weeks ago. Gone soft too. Healthcare plan. Hypoallergenic blanket. Goes by Mr. Boots now."
@weinerdog4life: Whenever you ride an elevator with other people, it's best not to mention your imaginary friends even if someone is standing on Carl.
@TheCiscoKidder: A fine piece of art is like a fine piece of ass, I don't understand either one but I want to take both home and mount them against the wall.