@ComedicBust: I was excited when my GF asked me to dress up as the cable guy, until I spent the next 3 hours on the roof, trying to fix the satellite dish
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@lovemyboots111: "One day I caught myself smiling for no reason, then I realized I was thinking of you...." under a moving bus
@BFNotAllowed: My boyfriend isn't allowed to break up with me. You wanna see other people? Look out the window.
@AimeeHelene1: The best call ever would be "Hey, it's me!", but from your dog... Because: 1. Aww your dog's calling you 2. Holy shit your dog can talk!!
@RatCasket: [two bros pacing back and forth and flexing to prove they arent gay after accidentally reaching for the xbox controller at the same time]